Benjamin can vacuum! ....and some other stuff too.

So Benjamin has been crazy messy lately. He LOVES a mess! Anything he has must come out of it's home and onto the floor/couch/him/everywhere. I should really let it go, but it's hard.....sometimes I feel like ALL I do is walk around and clean up gunky stuff.

I see a pattern though...this little mischievous behavior is magnified when I'm on the phone. :) This past week when I was on the phone, he was home from pre-school with a little cold and some nasty poo poo issues, so we decided to take it easy and hang out in front of the TV for the day. I made us some popcorn to enjoy. He gathered all the popcorn in his hands and threw it up in the air! I was on the phone with a photography client and didn't want to be rude, so I kindly encouraged him to stop, but didn't pull out the mommy voice in full force. So that was the day Benjamin learned to vacuum. That's at least one thing I feel like I kind of do well....he makes the mess....he cleans it up. Sorry, no pics I guess....blogger won't let me. :(

About a week ago, we had a crazy, messy morning! It all started with our cool orange jello that we made to celebrate fall. Benjamin ate it up...like a mad man! He scoured the bowl in seconds. I looked over and noticed he even had jello in his hair. Ok, so I decided he'd take a bath. I stripped his jello clothes and he made a beeline for the bathtub...peeing all the way. Pause. I won't say we have officially started potty-training but we talk about the potty nonstop. "Whenever you feel your pee-pee or poo-poo coming, we have to go to the potty, ok?" Um....all over the floor, yep. I put him in the tub and quickly mop the floor. Just as I finished my sweet mother-in-law called. I figured that would be no big deal, because Benjamin loves the bath, so he could just get a good soaking. I looked up at Ben and he was standing up, leaning out of the tub, swirling his foam paintbrush in the toilet. I yelled (yes yelled, even though I was only a few feet away) for him to get out of the toilet and sit down in the tub. Then he did the unthinkable, he put the paintbrush in his mouth. I know, gross. Apearently, to him, all water is equal. So I tried to wash him while he squirmed and screamed and eventually had to get off of the phone - I know Rick's mom thought I was insane, especially the way I talked to (or yelled at) her grandchild! As soon as he got out of the tub, he peed again....I obviously have some mad potty-training skills! So I got him dressed and got out the mop....again. :)

He is also refusing to sleep these days...don't quite know what all that is about, but in all the craziness, messiness, two-year-old fits, etc., I have clung to him and love him now more than ever.

A lot has happened around us lately that has made me put the small things in perspective. Susan, a 33-year-old mother of 3-year-old twins and youth minister's wife, also a Troy and CSC alum, passed away about a month ago during an out-patient routine brain surgery. She had a severe stroke during the procedure and came out with no brain activity. Hailey, a sweet 2-year-old friend of ours from Marietta is suffering with brain cancer. She endured 2 long years of treatment and was declared cancer-free but it has returned and spread and treatment is no longer an option, just keeping her comfortable. She will leave behind two of the bravest parents and 3 siblings.

These families are so burdened. I cannot imagine losing anyone so close to me. I've also had a hard time understanding "why." People say, "It's not meant for us to understand," but lately that hasn't been enough for me. We pray, we know God is powerful, I don't know why some people get to live and some people don't. I've have really been in turmoil over this since things happened with Susan.

Then recently, as crazy as it sounds, God started talking to me, or maybe I started listening. I listened to a sermon online from our prev. minister at EC. It was about how God is with us in the form of his spirit and it's our choice whether we doubt or trust. That really resonated with me. I know it's plain and simple, but if I'm honest, I really was a little bit mad at God I guess, and I didn't want to turn to Him. The next day I drove to Auburn to spend the day with Julia. We had an incredible time and Benjamin loved playing on the playground for hours while we caught up. On the way home, I passed a sign that said, "Lean not on your own understanding." It was interesting to me that the whole verse was not on the sign, but just the part I needed. Then next night, God gave it to me. One of the main verses in our small group was Isaiah 55:8-9. Wow!

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,
As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Ok, I get it. It's like they say, "it's not meant for us to understand." I had to hear it from Him though. I kept reading and found the most beautiful scripture, I applied it to Hailey's life.

As the rain and the snow come down from heaven,
and do not return to it without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of the briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord's renown, for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed.

I don't remember a time when I have ever been so comforted by scripture and felt God's presence so close, even when I didn't agree with Him, or understand Him, I knew He was with me. We have technology to do more now, and I've come to expect things are going to be ok, but there are times, when sickness takes over. I've also learned that I have failed to praise God when He does heal, comfort and grant our requests. All makes me yearn more for heaven...no more of the yucky stuff.

I don't normally share like this on the blog, but maybe you are in need of comfort today too....

Blessings,

Lauren